Abandonment, Part Two

Where Were We?

Oh yes, my dad was going to abandon me in a month. Let’s put that on the calendar. As I recall, he would be heading out the end of January. It just occurs to me now why he even waited a month. Guess he wanted to give his employer the customary two-week notice. What else he wanted to do, I have no idea.

Us

Divorce

One thing I do know is that he was looking forward to returning to Kentucky. He was anxious to set up residency there. The sooner that happened, the sooner he could start divorce proceedings. At the time I think you had to have lived in the state at least one year. I only remember two things during that month. One, it was the first time I can remember my mother ever giving me a hug. (I can feel it now.) She held me as she told me that she and my dad were getting a divorce. About from this point to two years out, I have little recollection of my life. I regained “consciousness” my senior year in high school. I didn’t realize that until I was an adult in counseling. I can only imagine what life was like with my mother those two years or so. Probably good I can’t remember.

Abandonment Day

As I mentioned, I remember two things from that month and this is the second. I don’t remember all the goings-on of the day but I remember the painful parts. I remember my dad going out to pick up a U-Haul trailer. It was the smallest one you could get that was covered. He wasn’t leaving with much stuff. He arrived back home and backed it in the driveway. I watched as he tracked to and fro through the living room taking his belongings to the trailer. I don’t remember my mother that day until the end. He was now packed and ready to start a new life with his old sweetheart. Of course, I didn’t learn that until later. I have to admit I love a good love story, just not at my expense.

Goodbye

It’s time. I don’t think as a 14-year-old that I had any idea what an impact this would have on my life and the feeling it would leave behind. He was standing in the driveway. His tan Toyota Corona and U-Haul were hitched and ready. My mother and I, standing side-by-side, watched from the open kitchen door. The sun was shining. He walked to the car, hesitated by the door and waved “goodbye.” My mother and I stood in awe. Then he opened the door and got in the driver’s seat. We stood there and watched him drive right out of our lives. Gone.

All was not lost though. Later he comes back into my life.

17 comments

    1. Oh,I remember that night so vividly. All of you were standing on the sidewalk near the edge of town. Waving and hollering as we drove by. It was a sheer surprise to me. I was in bad shape and cried all the way to Florida. Diane, we’re still friends. Thank you for visiting this site and posting a comment.

    1. It was icky. I am not alone. Divorce is hard on kids and continues still. Thank you for visiting, Lisa. Really appreciate the Comment.

  1. I’m so glad you’re blogging, Yvonne. I’ve only known you as an excellent yogi and cat lover! It’s an eye opener for me to know the abandonment you experienced as a baby/child and fortunately had the foresight to seek help through counseling.

    1. Maureen, thank you for stopping by and posting a comment. I know how hard you work with your social work with women. Thank you for your contribution to this important cause. I encourage counseling on all things, heavy duty or light issues. Namaste.

  2. I too was so sad you leaving KY. You were my sweet friend, and still are, and my playmate. All these years wondering about my childhood friend, and sweet Diane from Eminence, helped me connect with you. My parents divorced when I was 6 and lucky to see my Dad maybe twice a year. I wasn’t abandoned as you were, but we all have scars and memories of the hurtful times as a child growing up. I’m so proud of you for being a fighter for yourself…know it had to be hard facing your parental treatment, and seeking counseling! That takes strength and courage! Love ya Yvonne….always!

  3. I cried when you left Eminence as a young girl. My sweet bff and playmate was gone, and over these decades always thought of you and how you were. Sweet Diane gave me the connection in finding you. I was so thrilled to reconnect with my childhood friend. We both came from divorced homes and I know those childhood memories and scars can really harm a child. Im so proud of you Yvonne for your strength and courage in all you went through, and sought counseling…good for you! I love ya and always will.

    1. Judy, thank you for the heartfelt comment. My childhood BFF, you didn’t go unscathed either after your parents’ divorce. Divorce is rough on all involved. It was heartbreaking for me to leave Eminence. The school, friends, parents, church, and library were my world. It was an escape from an unpleasant home life. I am a firm believer in counseling. I believe everyone can benefit. We must look after our mental health. Thank you for visiting. Thank you for leaving a Comment. Much love always.

  4. Have now read all your posts, and love your wonderful, breezy, conversational style – even when discussing very serious issues. So glad you’ve started The Bruno Papers. I’ll look forward to reading more. It takes courage to write so honestly. Thank you for doing so. You are an inspiration to us all.

    1. Thank you, Charlotte, for your oh so kind words. They mean so much. It is scary sharing yourself with others. I hope some people can relate and feel that all is not lost. Thank you for leaving a comment. Much love.

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